“It’s always been my feeling that God lends you your children until they’re about eighteen years old. If you haven’t made your points with them by then, it’s too late.” –Betty Ford
Tomorrow – Wednesday, September 12, 2012 is the big day. My stomach is tingly, I’m excited and scared all at the same time. I guess this is how my daughter felt on her first day of school this year.
Tomorrow is my first day of work. And I’m nervous. I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this way. It’s not like I’ve never started a new job before, I have but this time it’s different. It probably is because I wasn’t expecting to find one so fast. And also the disappointment that my plans of writing for a living had to take a spot on the back burner for a while and all the stuff that goes along with working from home, the flexibility to be there with my daughter.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m excited to go back to work. The company is great, and the staff are awesome. I think I need a change of scenery, interact with people and a normal routine. I think it would be good for me. And not to mention the money will definitely help the financial situation I’m in because of this divorce.
But I’m also sad. Going back to work also means that I won’t be able to bring my daughter to school in the mornings and sneak in a kiss before she joins her friends in the line up at the door. No more seeing her peek through the door to see if I’m there to pick her up after school. She’s awesome and I just love being with her. Growing up I always wanted to be home with my children – work from home, be there on the trips, the mornings, afterschool, bring them to activities.
I know it will get better with time. I know that I’ll be fine. It’s the same feeling in my stomach every new school year, but this time it’s me going out there into the big, humungous world this time.
So with that, tonight I got our lunch bags and water bottles ready on the countertop for tomorrow morning.
I have prepped my breakfast, lunch and smoothie as well.
The bags are by the door.
All that is left is our clothes for the morning, and planning dinner for tomorrow night!
We’ll be off to bed soon for an early start in the morning. Wish me luck!